Monday, June 4, 2007

Birthday Week

This is going to be one fun, busy week! Five more days until my baby turns two years old! What a little man he is already. This last month has brought so many changes in terms of his speech, developing personality, and a newfound desire for some independence. He's recently started eating cereal with milk out of a bowl and with a spoon, and as if that isn't big-boy enough, when he finished eating today, he picked up the bowl and drank the remaining milk and didn't even spill! That may not sound like a big deal to many, but to this mommy, that's huge! I wanted to cry. =) I just can't wait for him to open his present from us. I already wrapped it, and Jonah excitedly anticipates the day he can open it! It's a really big box (because it holds a train set), and I asked Jonah this morning what he thought was in his present, and he paused for a minute and then confidently exclaimed, "A Red Donut!" Wow. I could have gotten off a whole lot easier with this birthday present thing if I'd known that was his big dream. I guess we'll have a birthday red donut for breakfast that day.

On Friday, my friend Melody (a college friend/roommate) came into town, and it was fun hanging out with her. Actually, it was a very encouraging time. She came over and had lunch with us, then she so sweetly joined me for an errand to Toys R Us, and we spent some good relaxing girl time at Starbucks. Good times. Later that afternoon, Joel and I took Jonah to the pool for his first swimming experience of this year. By the way, I cannot believe we haven't been able to go to the pool this year before June 1st! I think it's the first time I can ever remember that happening in Texas. But it was great fun! The water was still pretty cool, but Jonah loved jumping from the side of the pool into Daddy's arms. He sure wanted to be held the whole time in the water, but when Joel would let go of him, he'd realize about two seconds later that he was ok thanks to his floaties, and he'd get happy. Can't wait until we get to go again!

I'm so thankful for some new energy God has recently given me for a particular relationship in my life. I've been so burdened for someone I love, and I have been disheartened to see this person make some choices that I know will have very destructive consequences. I know that this person hasn't been anywhere in his/her heart that I haven't been, but I am just overwhelmed with gratitude that God did not leave me there and that He provides grace and forgiveness for everyone and LOVES to redeem messed up lives. That is His specialty. I want so much for this person to realize that and embrace a whole new life with Him. I've prayed for so long about my role in it, if it involves speaking out directly and/or a "confrontation" of some sort. Although I've wanted to speak up at times, God has kept me silent, never giving me confirmation that that's what He wanted. So I've just waited and prayed. And just this week, I sense that He's leading me to just pour out love on this person and to really nurture that relationship more. I didn't realize I had stopped doing that, until He pointed it out this week. I never stopped loving this person, but I realized that I had stopped opening up my life as much, I stopped inviting this person in, and I learned that fear of rejection was definitely playing a part. I had no idea. I have to be willing to keep trying, even when there is resistance, keep opening up my life and building a relationship in an effort to let Christ shine through. I cannot be a vessel of God's abundance grace if I close myself off or stop trying to erode the distance that is between us. So I felt refreshed, knowing that God wants me to stop thinking so much about what I can say and more about how I can find opportunities to once again invest in this person on a relational level and surround him/her with God's love. His love is the only thing that changes people anyway. And I will definitely have to look for those opportunities. They are not just coming my way; I'll have to be intentional. And He has already started leading me to some of those opportunities. But I am SO EXCITED about what God is doing in this situation! I realized a few days ago that if He were showing me all of this about how I am to respond to this person, He is STILL AT WORK. Why else would He even be showing me this stuff?! He is working in this person's life. And I may just get to play a role in expressing God's love, so I have to be willing to do that. But He's doing something! That I know for sure. And sometimes when you pray for something for so long and you haven't gotten any signs that change is happening or coming, it gets hard. My friend Kelli calls those signs "glimpses", and that's exactly what I got this week: a glimpse into something God is working on, and it brought hope and encouragement. I can't wait to see how He finishes it! (Phil. 1:6)


Courtney said...

is it me?

Courtney said...

well good! :) i was a tad worried but only because I am a worrier and insecure really...oh well. anyway, i hope you and jonah have a fantastic birthday! my plan of course is to get a card in the mail by tomorrow, but i am not really sure if that will happen or not, but know i am trying :)